Northern California, January 2006

Today we reached the Pacific!!!

Right after the sun went down we descended down from the Siskiyou Mtns, following the absolutely pristine Smith River and passed thru the ‘seen better days’ town of Crescent City. This was also right after Leigh had her first Redwood experience in Jedidiah State Park on the way out of the mountains. She was just in total awe (for good reason) and was feeling very sad when we left them. But then we just kept driving west thru town until we couldn’t drive anymore and there she was, the glorious and stormy Pacific!

Such a profound site to see, especially after coming thru such winding, narrow canyons following the river then thru the dark, tall temperate jungle of the Redwoods, finally arriving at the end of the country, the border between terrain and aquatic. Land of mammals makes way to world of fish. I can really understand how early explorers like Lewis and Clark or Jedidiah Smith felt upon arrival at the Left Coast….awe, humility, gratitude, rapture, excitement….all of these same emotions washed over me as I gazed out over the dark waters, watching the sun make its final exit for the day. The soothing sound of waves crashing and the refreshing but chilly kiss of the sea breeze were my first moments out of the rental car.

The figurative waves of memories washing over me came next. For those who don’t know, I spent over 1 ½ years out here on the coast during a student exchange between Humboldt State University and the University of Georgia. And if it weren’t for a particular red head pulling me back to the East after my student exchange was over, who knows if I would have ever moved back? My time in Northern California was both very challenging and enriching. Yet at the same time, I know that I was not living up to my full potential either. Like the land around me, I was in a fog most of my time here and was not aware at the time (or choose to ignore) my self confidence and self esteem. It was a dark time for me, a lonely time. I felt more alone out here than I ever did before or since. The coast here is very inhospitable, with jagged rocks and very few deep harbors, and it avoided settlement until the middle of the 19^th century when gold was discovered nearby. So it is a somewhat isolating place and living here I definitely felt isolated and alone.

Friends were hard to come by out here. There is an unfortunate air of paranoia out there that I believe prevents people from opening up to others are readily as they would in say Portland or Boulder or Athens. I kept knocking on people’s hearts only to be left out in the cold. Maybe everybody here was too stoned to say hi. Maybe the weather and constant winter rain disrupted normal social norms. Maybe I was young and stupid. After all this was over 10 years ago (10 years…WOW!) and I have grown stronger and surer since those tentative days. But I honestly believe there was something more going on that to this day bothers me and feels like rejection. I’m dealing with it in my own time (or no time apparently).

However, I did make a few friends while I was out here, and as a matter of fact, I’ll be visiting two of them while in San Francisco! I am very excited to see them again, especially after so many years of just keeping in touch through phone or email conversations.

But I digress (which if you haven’t noticed by now, happens a lot…..the tangential mind is a terrible thing to waste)…..

It was a perfect day for a drive! The weather for our drive through Oregon today was out of this world. There were colors in the sky today I have never seen before – patches of peach and green and blue. Cloud patterns and colors that were sublimely beautiful (and totally distracting). The sun was shining down on us today almost all day. Sometimes through breaks in the clouds, sometimes in the clear blue sky, sometimes through the mist and fog, and sometimes the poor sun was pushed away by the occasional bully cloud who just didn’t get the memo that today was a sunny day. The scenery driving south from Portland was very nice too. We followed the Willamette River for about a third of the trip, and then into the Umpqua River drainage for another third and the final third we followed the Smith River in California from the snowy mountains to the pounding sea. Towards the southern end of Oregon and on through to Northern California was a striking covering of snow on the tops of the tallest ridges and mountains. It had only just fallen the night before and down to only a certain elevation. So where we were driving was nowhere close to the snow, but driving and looking out to either side we could see the snow crowned hills standing tall over the sun touched river and farming valleys full of dairy and sheep (yes, I said sheep) farms. It added such a surreal dimension to the drive.

We started the day renting our car in Portland. A red Toyota Corolla. And following the tradition we started on our honeymoon in Panama where we named our little green rental car La Raña Verde (the Green Frog), we named this one La Raña Roja (the Red Frog). This will probably be the last car either of us drives for quite awhile. Even after not driving for a week, it was weird to get behind the wheel. After a warm farewell on the streets of downtown Portland from Deb and Moon (her wonderful canine companion), we headed off for a quick ‘ciao’ to Sasha (Leigh’s other best friend here and who we had a delicious and most enjoyable chill night of wine and conversation at their place one night while we were here). The trip has worked out wonderfully so far. The first part of it being all Leigh’s friends – Christy, Deb and Sasha. This next part, the second half, is all my friends – Jeremy & Mebyne, Steve, Laura, Todd and Kathy. So besides tonight, we have a place to stay with friends. It has been so great and I can only imagine it continuing as such.

From Seattle to Portland is only about 3 hours or around 200 miles. But after you get to Portland, the next big city is San Francisco, about 12 hours or 600 miles away. Like I said, with its un-navigable harbors, rocky and cliff -like shores, not many people wanted to settle here back when the white man thought he owned everything he saw or touched.

So we find ourselves, after 6 hours or so in the car, and a beautiful drive later, staying in the Redwoods National Park in the Redwoods Hostel. We would have preferred camping in the woods and experiencing the coast a little more directly (not to mention saving some much needed $$), but the threat of rain here is ever present and we did not want to have to deal with wet gear in San Francisco or on the plane. So we played it safe, bit the bullet, and paid for a bed. And I have to tell you, this place if really charming. It has the set up of a B & B – Victorian house, you stay in a bedroom, there’s a cute couple running it, a kitchen, common room, etc. Very cozy, very pleasant. But you definitely have much more independence and autonomy here. You fix your own food, do your own dishes. Personally, I like it a little more than feeling like I’m staying in someone’s house and making them cook and clean for me (after all I just got away from living with mom again!). The Hostel overlooks the ocean and we can hear the waves thru our bedroom window. It is still warm enough here to leave the windows open for fresh air and not get cold.

Before I get too much distance from my last couple days in Portland, there are a couple of experiences I want to share. The first is the Japanese Gardens, located in Forest Park (the largest urban park in the United States). These are world renowned gardens and after visiting them I can understand why. They are breathtaking, even in the winter! While walking by sculpted green trees; meticulously raked white rock gardens; and waterfalls, ponds, bridges and stone arranged in such a visually ordered yet naturally harmonious way; I realized that this is probably my favorite garden style. It resonates very deeply with me. The interaction of man and nature in a harmonious yet creative way. The structure and order sculpted from the apparent chaos of the natural world. The deep meditative qualities that bubbles to the surface after spending just a few minutes sitting in such a place. To see everything around me treated sacredly, respected and cherished for its inherent qualities. It was 3 hours spent walking through a Temple to Life, a Temple to Earth…..This undeniable reverence to Nature and Mother Earth is the main reason I go out into the woods and camp or backpack so much. To experience life directly, with all the senses opened, I believe brings me closer to the Divine and closer to my true Self. And it was so amazing to be contemplating these thoughts or others that would drift by on the mental screen when the sun would break thru the clouds and completely change the mood and feel of the scene before and thus my thoughts, my mood as well. Then the sun would go away and the rain would come and then again, the visual mood or resonance would shift ever so slightly (or sometimes quite dramatically) and the thought pattern would shift as well. I feel so grateful for moments like that – personal, private, transformative – seeing clearly a universal truth. And this was all during the gray drizzly cool winter season. I can’t imagine what my reactions or thoughts would be during the spring and summer when there are flowers, steady sunlight and warm air!

After visiting what I consider to be a mini-Mecca to me, the Japanese Gardens, we then left the gardens to visit one of Leigh’s mini-Mecca’s – Powell’s New & Used Bookstore. Imagine a 3 story city block of books, floor to ceiling high. This place is amazing! A virtual maze of literature, history, humor, politics, science….you name it, they have it. We spend over 2 hours perusing, reading, looking up, and getting lost in words. They have a coffee shop in the middle of it so you can get fueled too. Border’s and Barnes have nothing on this place. It is so refreshing (and necessary) to see large, successful, independent bookstores doing well. We both picked up a couple more books for the road (like we need anymore weight at this point – d’oh!)….for me Centennial by Michener, Dune by Herbert, and Confederacy of Dunces….for Leigh she got a couple academic books and an art book….in other words, I got the fun ones and she got the heady ones.

Now, before we leave Portland, there is one more place I have to describe – The Kennedy School. Nothing probably sums up the quirky cool of Portland like this place does. Built in the early part of the 20^th century, it was an elementary school for many, many years. At some point it closed down and began to fall into disrepair. At another point in the not too distant past, the school was either bought or donated and it was renovated very creatively. It is a large single floor building with beautiful dark hard wood floors and paneling. During the renovations, tile mosaics where created on the walls and snake down the halls in vine like patterns erupting in colorful flowers or sun splashes every random while. There are large b&w photographs on the wall displaying the’ Class of 1919’, the very first class of Kennedy, the very last class at Kennedy, and images of the city of Portland during the 10’s, 20’s & 30’s. There are also a variety of paintings done by local artists following an education/school/Kennedy theme full of color and craziness. There are two bars – one is called the Dunce Room, the other called the Honor Room. There is a pretty good restaurant that serves microbrews and pub food. There are a couple large cafeteria style rooms that were rented out the night we went there by a crawfish boil and a family reunion. And the piece-de-resistance for me was the small swimming pool they have converted into a hot bath. It is located outside so we were lounging in 102 degree water while the cold Portland air and drizzle kept our hair and heads chilly. Closest thing to a Colorado winter hot tub post skiing I’ve had! It was fabulous. Deb had invited a bunch of her friends down to join us so we could meet some new people and enjoy a nice sense of community with her. And after the very relaxing soak we headed into the pub for some good beers and food. The place is eclectic, creative, relaxing, stimulating, historical, educational, fun, and totally enjoyable….much like Portland.